Just checking in.

[Faith-and-Hope]

Yeah, that would be pretty exciting @Teej ......

[Sans911]

@Teej - I like you very much just as you are right now. I love your rawness, your courage and your vulnerability. You can't possibly know what someone else needs all the time, and particularly in this medium, without the addition of emotions and body language, it's so difficult. So you're not to blame for missing the mark sometimes. A willingness to learn and grow is a step in the right direction.

I think you hold yourself accountable for helping everyone else, and when that doesn't quite go to plan, you punish yourself through sh.

Know you first, now yourself well, get comfortable with all the sides of you. That way, you will know and feel OK about helping others, but not being accountable for their reactions, which is something you have no control or influence over.

You have so much compassion, kindness and empathy for others, but it's time to take some back for you.

💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

[outlander]

@Teej 💜💜

[oceangirl]

@TeejMany people like you, and you have the ability to get to the essence of who people truly are, and I think that is quite unique. I remember when I was in hospital in Sydney and I had to write out 50 qualities about myself- maybe that would be a good exercise for you to do. You could write them down here. 

Btw we are walking with you, and you have such a beautiful nature, and its okay not to always get it right. We are perfectly imperfect. You're way too hard on yourself, and you need to learn to be your own best friend. 

@Teej  What did you discovery about yourself on Saturday??

[Teej]

@Sans911 The very big lesson I learned in the last few weeks is that I can’t be responsible for anyone’s actions. I learned it the hard way and I learned it from you and then talking about it with mh team. I am eternally grateful that lesson though. It came at the right time for me. I have been taking responsibility for everybody’s actions as long as I can remember and I now know where it came from. 

I think im beginning to try to let go of some of my long held beliefs but it will be a bit bumpy still. 

@oceangirl . I went driving with a new friend and we went exploring and had lunch out. It was a lot of time being in nature again but the thing that was so significant to me was that my friend loved it too. I had believed for so long that it was something I’d never have again, just a simple but really good day. It didn’t cost much, a pasty and a coffee at the bakery. I haven’t been able to find that same enjoyment in nature by myself for all those years. It always felt empty and hollow. It was so nice to chat about the plants and rocks and animals we saw. It felt like the old me and I didn’t have to be anyone else because my friend has a mi too and there is so much that doesn’t need to be said and no fear of judgement. 

Thank you both for your very kind words and encouragement.  💜🤗

[Sans911]

I'm glad you learned a lesson from me, but I'm sorry it caused you distress at the time. That's never an easy thing to sit with.

@Teej

[oceangirl]

@Teej  I am so happy you have company & friendship- it makes a hug difference. An outing doesn't need to cost much at all, for you to have a good time. We spend so much time & money on things that really don't matter. What matters most to me, are the people who support me without judgement and I think that is rare to find these days.

I can sense a shift happening here and you forging ahead in your life. I am really pleased that you had a good day my friend and there are plenty more to come. I've started feeling better since being back on the forum more regular and connecting here. 

[Faith-and-Hope]

Would love to see you get back to something like making electronic greeting cards @Teej ...... I think you would be really good at it.

💜🌷

[eth]

s to you from me too @Teej   Lovely to see the beautiful support and thoughtful responses you've been receiving here.  I'm not sure I can really add anything to the beautiful sentiments already expressed to you (all of which I wholeheartedly agree with) but hope you can feel my support as you go on your journey of self-discovery with awareness - sometimes it's almost like we are observing ourselves like a 2nd persona to see areas with lots to offer the world and areas we want to develop.  Such self-awareness is one of the secrets to life imo and you have it in spades.  

Lots of love xx

[Teej]

Hi and just checking in. So grateful for the responses of support yesterday and I guess a little surprised and confused but in an ok way. 

I am so so so so tired and confused about some personal things. I have a really busy  at first then heavy next few days then I can breathe before I have to pull the mask on on Sunday again. 

Today was really messy with some good, some lovely and some twisted, insecure and lost moments. I did not sleep last night at all. About to go to bed soon and hope that tomorrow is a new day and that I can do what I need to. 

Hugs to all. 💜🤗