Lived Experience Forum

[Turtle_guns]

I have a terrible time communicating. 
I don't express my feelings well and tend to bottle them up which then affect my relationships. 
I tend to have little patients. 
I don't know if this is because of a lack of an outlet (no rugby)

recently I took my wife away for her birthday. Somethings didn't go to plan and i shut up. I didn't take it well and I made the whole weekend a negative experience all through not communicating and not being able to express everything. Now my marrige is breaking down (fingers crossed it doesn't)

and I don't know what I'm going to do. We've got a baby girl together and I don't know what's going to happen in the future. I don't want to think of a life without both my wife or daughter. 
help!

[Blep]

Hey @Turtle_guns. You really should be giving yourself a big pat on the back because you have realised that there is a problem and it needs to be fixed. A lot of people don't do that so a big thumbs up. Now it's to try and gain the right tools to fix the problem.

I would recommend some sort of counselling to find out why it is you can't not communicate. I have problems speaking up because of trauma from a previous relationship. I'm still working on this and it has been 6yrs.

You can also do a communication course which helps you with different styles of speaking.

Lastly I would recommend maybe trying couples therapy. Working through this as a team should help strengthen your relationship.

Hope you can find your words soon.

Blep 😸:tongue:

[Maggie]

@Turtle_guns  Things are sounding really tough.

I think @Blep  has made a few good suggestions. Counseling for both of you might be a place to start.

Could you let your wife know you can’t imagine a life without her and your daughter in it.? We all need to hear words of appreciation, she might be really struggling with not understanding what’s really happening.

Take care.