Lived Experience Forum

[McFluffy]

Hello,

I am a gay middle-aged man who is disabled and lives in a small rural community of about 100 people.

Due to my limitation, I can’t drive to a disability, health, or mental welfare support service easily.  There is a bus to and from our community once a day, however this can be time limiting.  Often, I can hitch a ride with someone else, but this can be rather revealing and embarrassing.

Rural communities can be great, but they’re very gossipy due to often there’s nothing else to do other than watch bad TV or get pissed.  I don’t drink and reality TV just makes me puke.  It can be lonely and isolating.

Rural community support can be great, but it’s conditional that you fit in the “normal’.  LGBTQI+ is something that is viewed with distain or a joke in my experiences, only good for further gossip.

I have tried to access some online and phone services tailored to rural communities, however these can be very destructive.  Often LGBTQI+ is viewed as “too difficult” or just simply refused.  Almost none will mention LGBTQI+ in their supported audiences on their information or websites.

Many more urban based LGBTQI+ inclusive support services don’t have a concept of rural difficulties and can be a little dismissive or even patronising… “I’m a rural hick, so talk slow”.  It is often hard for more urban support services to understand that simple things like getting milk and bread is a challenge and might require a long bicycle ride to fetch.  Or living in a rural community is filled to the brim with people who own guns, and cPTSD can be triggered by incidental occurrences like a gun safe in the back of a ute.

While this place does offer some limited support, does anyone know of a phone service that is LGBTQI+ inclusive and has a rural challenges empathy?

Thank you for your acknowledgments?

[tyme]

Hey @McFluffy ,

It sure sounds like a tough place to be in. I can see that it can be so lonely to be in this situation. 

Have you every utilised the QLife service? https://qlife.org.au/

You may find them helpful in sharing LGBTQIA+ resources and services with you.

We look forward to hearing from you.

[McFluffy]

@tyme thank you. I will give them a try and see if the phone bits n' bobs work for me.

[Jasper_123]

Hi @McFluffy , 

What a challenging experience! I've had a quick google and hopefully something here will help you!

https://au.reachout.com/articles/lgbtqi-support-services 

[tyme]

How are you today @McFluffy ?

Did you do anything special today?

[McFluffy]

@tyme thanks for asking.  Had a great day today, hope yours was super duper.  Quiet day, just the way I like it.  Did nice things just for myself, just because I can...  A little self indulgence from time to time is great.  Hope you were able to indulge yourself too.

[McFluffy]

@tyme did need to distract myself today, some terrible night terrors...  But all said and done, had a good day, nice people, bit of chocolate and a movie can do wonders.  Wishing you indulgences too.

[tyme]

That sounds so pleasant @McFluffy . I'm glad you indulged yourself. I can't say I fully indulged myself... I will one day. I want to go to a pancake cafe soon. I've been hanging out for gourmet dessert pancakes... That'll be the day I indulge lol. 

I'm sorry to hear you had night terrors. That's so tough. Recently, I've had flashbacks of the past, and that was bad enough... but night terrors can be so upsetting. 

Do you have pets?

[McFluffy]

not pets, but an assistance animal.  

[Asgard]

Hi @McFluffy 

How are ye doing there, thats one small community you live in and I can imagine that everyone knows each others business.  Am middle aged and gay myself so I get what you are saying.  Was wondering if you have tried Qlife 1800 184 527 they are specifically aimed at the rural gay community, so ye never know ye might get some use out of them. 

Hope the above helps 🙂